>>3749181>Just like you don't know what health is when you've always been fat, you don't know what a clean spirit is until you give up the porn and sadism.I agree with everything you've said except for
that part, which I can only agree with partially:
Firstly, I know that unlike
Dor
K (who's insane enough to have made torment and utter death his friend), Steam is
suffering from being eaten alive from the inside out by demons. That means that on
some level he knows that there's better out there - he might not know exactly what this better looks and sounds like, but he knows it's out there, and that he longs for it. We
all long to have a spiritual connection, and (generally) we know instinctively when what we're getting isn't genuine - even when we've never learnt of anything else. However, the deceived and injured mind and heart will cloud one's judgement and become misguiding, and it'll simply end up easier and more "reachable" to believe in and choose lies/destruction over truth/life.
Therefore, fat people will oftentimes know that what they're doing is unhealthy, they just
don't want to know (about) or confront such a fact.
Self-abusers/sadists/porn (etc.) addicted will oftentimes know there's better out there, and they'll even recognise it, but they'll turn away from it for some reason.
People (and animals) will turn away from something better, if they don't feel that it is reachable for them - if they feel that going towards that better thing will end up hurting them even more than remaining with their current destructive situation.
The fear of opening oneself up (to someone who appears to be trustworthy) and then being let down (which would cause immense disappointment and hurt), or an overbearing sense of shame and worthlessness will keep people from choosing the better alternative. Preferring the known/reliable dulling of the pain of previous and lingering traumas by applying self-destructive coping mechanisms (escapism, addictions, sadism, self-abuse, etc.) over the
uncertainty involved in moving away from the abuse/destruction, is enough to cause people (and animals) to continue the (self)-abuse.
A severely abused dog will almost always return to its abusive "master" - not because it's "stupid" (it's not) but because it fears the alternative, and sometimes can't even fathom it.